What was the proper etiquette for brain-eating? Pinky up? No slurping sounds? A dainty belch at the end?

Both the zombie mafia and the rebel zombie alliance could suck my white trash undead ass.

I was tough. I was fierce. I was already seating my ass off and hadn’t even started to run yet.

Zombie Super Powers, Activate!

Welcome to death.

Just because I’m insane doesn’t mean I have to act all crazy.

I lost my virginity on the football field of East St. Edwards High School, and had been kidnapped from that same place years later. And now I’d just been in the thick of a crazed zombie mob on the Tucker Point High football field. Might be best for everyone if I avoided football in general from now on.

I’m finally getting my life together. Too bad I had to die first.

Too easy to lose the way. Too hard to keep from unraveling when there’s nothing to remind you of who you are and where you should be. Another eternity passes in the flick of an eyelash.

Had I managed to fall into some sort of carnivorous plant? Yeah, bleed on the man-eating plant. Always a good plan.